By Jeanine Englert
I am a firm believer that timing is everything and that time (along with dogs) can heal well almost anything. I also believe that books find me when I need them. Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert was the book I needed recently, and listening to it has saved the creator and maker in me.
Do I sound overdramatic? Yes. Am I still serious. Yes. To say that I was in burnout with my writing seems an understatement, especially now that I have finally peeked out of the well I had fallen into. And let me tell you, I denied it for a long while before I named it. Then, even when I named it, I just sat and eyed it suspiciously as if we were having a staring contest. I didn’t know what to do with it. I suppose I just carried it around a while and pretended we were old friends.
We weren’t.
How did I get there? I think the answer when I think about it is simple. I published 6 books over the last 3 years and I have another one coming out in October. For someone who took 9 years to finish their first book (which will never emerge from its shoebox), this pace of output was and is too much for me. I’m a pantster, so the percolating and amount of time my mind needs to create is simply more than what I had contractually allowed myself.
And the other brutal and painful truth is that I did it to myself. I didn’t have to sign contracts and have such close pub dates. I knew when I signed them that I had a full-time job, husband, pups, and the rest of what is a life to lead. I knew there were only so many hours in a day, but I kept saying yes.
I just didn’t know I was saying yes to the wrong things.
Until I listened to Big Magic. I listened to it on the way to work and on the way home from work, and slowly I felt the black gloom of burnout ease back enough to let some creative light back in. So, now I say yes to curiosity, my creative self, and allowing my creativity to breathe. I stilled and listened to the quiet until I could hear and feel that “big magic” within me coming back to life with the slow fluttering of its little butterfly wings.
While I don’t know if you are in, near, or burnout adjacent, please take a moment to breathe and to let your craft and creativity breathe. Sit quiet with it for a while and make sure you pause and celebrate the art of whatever you have made or are making. Nurture your big magic. . . and above all else, if you haven’t given yourself the gift of listening to or reading Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert, do so. The creator within you will thank you.
Jeanine Englert’s love affair with mysteries and romance began with Nancy Drew, Murder She Wrote, and her Grandmother’s bookshelves full of romance novels. She is a VIVIAN® and Golden Heart® Finalist as well as a Silver Falchion, Maggie, and Daphne du Maurier Award Winner in historical romance and mystery.
Her Scottish Highland historical and historical romantic suspense novels revolve around characters seeking self-acceptance and redemption. When she isn’t wrangling with her characters on the page, she can be found trying to convince her husband to watch her latest Masterpiece or BBC show obsession. She loves to talk about books, writing, her beloved rescue pups, as well as mysteries and romance with other readers. Visit her website at www.jeaninewrites.com.
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thank you. I will put it on my list. I read her first book and loved it. The book that saved my creative life and jumpstarted it was The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron and I still recommended to everybody.
I am glad you’re out from under your black cloud, or at least speaking out and able to check out the possible rainbows.
Sue, thank you so much for all of your kindness. And I will add Julia’s book to my list. 🙂